by Sara McGinnis posted in Parenting

"No, your friend cannot not taste your booger," is a phrase I distinctly remember uttering while teaching preschool. Runners up included, "The toilet is for peeing, not the sink," and "We do not eat snacks through our ears."
Working with a dozen or so tiny people day in and day out I thought I'd said all the crazy things one could possibly ever need to -- but I'm now realizing our school setting eliminated other situations, such as all the fun ways an uninhibited child might interact with a pet.
Can't say I'm sorry to have missed out first-hand, but they are great to hear about. Check out the crazy phrases members of the Reddit community recall having to actually speak aloud... girlofgallifrey: "Don't use the cat as a tissue."
Fins2TheRight: "Don't eat the raw meat." We were at one of those Mongolian grill places where you fill up your bowl with raw food and the guys cook it on the round griddle in front of you. Next thing you know, my son is sitting at the table about to eat some chicken sushi!
bscav: "Please don't put your sister's hair clip on your penis."

man-panda-pig: When I was 3, I would take a [poop] in the backyard just like my dog. We were best buds! We didn't have privacy fencing and my neighbors saw everything and had a talk with my mom.
PeevesPoltergist: "Don't lick the paper lanterns."
omg_pwn135: Babysitting my niece. Had to tell her she can?t take a...