After loss, anyone who complains about their baby seems obnoxious
by Melissa Willets posted in Pregnancy
I used to be one of those moms. The ones who complain about middle-of-the-night feedings, teething, potty training, homework, and picky eaters. The ones who act like it's the end of the world if your baby suffers from colic, or won't let you put him down, or only sleeps for two hours at a clip. Like your life is sooo hard if your toddler won't wean, or sticks his hand down his diaper obsessively.
But now that I've lost my baby, all those parents who wring their hands over whining little ones, lack of "me" time, bedtime and feeding battles, and bath-time poop explosions just seem obnoxious to me. Because at least you have your babies. With you. And you get to see them, and hold them, and watch them sleep; the rise and fall of their chests as they breathe. You get to feel their warm bodies and hot tears. Comfort them. Love them. Sure, a month after saying goodbye to a baby my family desperately wanted, I still get annoyed when my older kids quarrel over a stuffed animal. I wish my 4-year-old didn't fight me on every little thing, from what she wears each day, to the dinner I put in front of her.
But I see the daily struggles of being a mom so differently after loss. I wish my baby could have been here to keep me up at night. I'd do anything for her to have the opportunity to grow up, and whine, complain and fight right along with her sisters. I would give my life for this child to interrupt me 20 times in one minute. Or ...
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