I just had a baby, so stop asking when I?m going to have another
by Jamie Reed posted in Parenting
It never fails. I?m out in public, minding my own business, when a stranger approaches me to comment on my baby boy. We go through the usual routine; he?s 4 months old, yes, he?s tall, no, I can?t tell what color his hair is going to be yet, etc. And then, without fail: ?When are you going to have another baby"?
Excuse me"
First, he?s 4 months old! I just had a baby! And kudos to you women who want your kids to be close in age, but I?m barely surviving right now as it is.
Second, deciding to have another baby is kind of a big decision and not one I?m prepared to discuss with you, kind stranger.
I think I forgot what it was like being asked about babies. When my husband and I first got married, it was quite common for people to ask when we were going to have a baby. I?d sheepishly grin and say ?Oh, someday!?, thinking that bought us a little more time. Weekends visiting my parents always brought lots of questions from the ladies at church who were not discreet as they?d look at my stomach, trying to make out a bump. The thing is, if you wait long enough to have a baby, people quit asking. After four or five years, the question came less frequently. After seven or eight years, no one dared ask, probably assuming we couldn?t have children or were having difficulty getting pregnant. When we did announce our pregnancy, suddenly, based on the comments I heard, we were fair game again!
?No one wants to be an only child!? Um, I?m sure ...
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