10 things NOT to say to the parents of a kid with autism
Often I can tell it?s going to happen?even before the words come out of their mouth. In fact I have to fight the urge to place my finger over the lips of the well-meaning, but oh-so-ill-informed, person and whisper, ?Shhh!? But since I can?t shush every relative, friend, acquaintance and complete stranger who has something to say about my kid, who has Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD), I?ve come up with this handy list of things never to say to us parents. Here goes:
1. He doesn?t look autistic.
A variation on ?he looks normal,? this kind of comment presumes you know what autism, or for that matter normal, looks like?which you don?t. Autism or ASD is referred to as a spectrum disorder for a reason: No two people with ASD look or behave in exactly the same way. Individuals with autism are just that?individuals?and should always be treated as such.
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How to be friends with a child who has autism 2. I knew something was wrong with her.
Maybe you did; maybe you didn?t. In most cases, a trained team of professionals join forces to determine a child?s diagnosis so there?s that to keep in mind. But, more important, this comment isn?t only presumptuous, it?s hurtful. You may be dying to say, ?I told you so,? but ask yourself: would any parent really want t...
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