Zara* was in the middle of a lovely bubble bath when she asked, “Mommy, I know I was in your tummy when I was a baby, but how did I get out of your tummy"” I could feel my eyebrows head upwards. It was way too soon for this question, wasn’t it"  ?Uhh…like this…? I offered, making a gesture that looked like instructions for taking a relaxing yoga breath. Then I quickly changed the subject, and my daughter moved on, likely without any permanent damage.
As a parent, not knowing what to say at times is pretty par for the course, but not knowing what to say during the complete life explosion called divorce is a different story entirely.
On top of my broken heart and my family breaking open at the seams, I felt like the things I said or didn?t say could be a big part of steering my daughter?s heart and mind?intact?through an emotional war zone. Sometimes, my attempts fell totally flat, like when I made light of moving by saying, ?We’re like birdies, moving to another nest!? and my then three-year-old countered with: ?But birds don’t have furniture.? Touché, little wise one.
Thankfully, there were a couple of things that did reach her, and when I was able to find the right words to make her hurt less, lighten her burden or just allow her to be a carefree kid, it was truly double-rainbow levels of relief and happiness.
1. Tell me more 
Over the past few years, ?tell me more? has never failed. It?s like a magical kid-frie...