GoFundMe campaigns are the first stop for many people who want to help a friend or a family in crisis. But do these do-gooders with the best of intentions stop to ask what the friend in need actually needs"
Five years ago, my son was injured in a biking accident. A deer jumped in front of him as he trundled down a mountain at mach speed. The result was a handlebar in the gut that ripped his ileocecal artery (the path of blood supply to the leg) and an emergency surgery followed. In short, it was terrifying. In the weeks to follow, I wanted to be with our son in the ICU, but we also had a ten-year-old and a house full of pets at home. The support of our Kamloops, B.C. community is what made it possible to cope during this time when I couldn?t think straight. I made mental notes of the type of help that made the greatest difference to our family so I could pay it forward down the road. This is what I came up with:
1. Be specific with offers of help
Saying ?let me know if I can help? is kind, but not very useful. At the start of a crisis, you don?t yet know what you need help with. People who reached out to me with specific offers of help, like ?Can we walk your dogs"? were most helpful. Help with identifying what might need to be done and offering to do it (or to help find a way to get it done) was crucial.
2. Think dependents
Offer to help with any dependents. Walking dogs, feeding cats, driving kids to school or even watering plants takes off an enormous load. Try...