Shannon* was upset when her father asked her not to bring her seven-year-old daughter, Pippa* to a family wedding. Pippa has autism spectrum disorder (ASD), a condition whose symptoms vary from child to child but can include repeating phrases or words, making noises to self-soothe, becoming overwhelmed in stimulating environments and preferring less physical and eye contact than the neurotypical child. Pippa?s grandfather said he didn?t want her to ruin the festivities by being ?disruptive.?
Parents of kids with special needs are often stressed out and stretched thin: physically, emotionally and financially. But instead of support, many find themselves facing rejection, criticism, and judgment from family members that they?d hoped would have their backs. ?It hurts worse when [that response] comes from family, because they are supposed to love you unconditionally,? Stephanie* says. The mother-of-two has been shamed at family gatherings for the atypical behaviour of her two sons, Robert* (seven) and Andrew* (10), both of whom are on the spectrum. In family settings, they may refuse to eat what other people are eating, engage in self-soothing behaviours like humming and bouncing in their seats, and repeat certain expressions. Stephanie?s uncle has told her, on more than one occasion, that the boys just need corporal punishment. ?He believes there is nothing wrong with them except poor parenting,? she says.
?I felt completely unsupported when I told my parents and siblings abou...