When he was three, Alex* used to start each morning of daycare by asking his teacher how she was and what she did the day before. ?He was really interested in her life,? recalls his mom, Erin Gray.*
Less interesting to him were his peers, with whom Alex struggled to connect. He mostly interacted with his teachers or played solo. But this preference for hanging out with the daycare staff over other preschoolers didn?t worry Gray, who says Alex was verbally advanced for his age. ?We just laughed and said, ?That?s our kid.??
Georgia Miller, an educator who specializes in children?s mental health and is based in Edmonton, says it?s not uncommon for kids to prefer adults to other kids. Some, like Alex, are cognitively ahead of their peers so they find adults more stimulating. Others may have anxiety or a lack of confidence in social situations, and playing with a trusted adult feels safer and easier. ?Children get to direct the play, there is no sharing involved and they get the control and power,? says Miller. While it?s not a major red flag if your kid isn?t a social butterfly, it is important to encourage them to play with kids their own age, because it helps them learn how to self-regulate, interact with others and make decisions, says Lisa Seward, a Toronto-based child and parenting coach who specializes in socialization. ?Play is how they learn how to navigate their world.?
Most neurotypical kids are ready to learn this around age three, as they move past the toddler par...