Illustration by Michael Byers

When Karina Sadu?s daughter was two and a half, she took her to a big family dinner at her sister?s house. Little Marcela had missed her nap, staying up during the two-hour car ride there, but Sadu thought it was going well. That is, until she looked over and saw Marcela nodding off, about to face plant into her mashed potatoes.?I caught her head in my hand just before it went down. She even had a little bit of mashed potato on her cheek and nose,? she says. ?I picked her up and gently put her down on the carpet under the table, and she slept at our feet for hours while we ate our dinner.?
It doesn?t always happen so dramatically, but holiday events often clash with kids? sleep routines. And it can be hard to know what to prioritize. After all, it?s important for kids to have quality time with their extended family. ?A little bit of indulgence once in a while, with the goal of delighting the child or allowing the child to connect with people or a family tradition?that?s great. That?s as important as your routine,? says Jillian Roberts, a child psychologist and author based in Victoria. She?s also a co-founder of FamilySparks, an organization that provides mental health services for families.
Many parents, like Sadu, live by this philosophy. Samantha Halvorson, a 35-year-old mom in Calgary, says her kids, who are three and one, often hang out with extended family past their bedtimes. She changes her kids into their PJs and encourages them to...